I hate it when I see parents forcing their kids to have the same hobbies and interests as them from an early age. I’m going to let my son Obi Wan make his mind up once he’s old enough to decide for himself.
Continue ReadingI was talking to a brown dwarf the other day. “You’re gonna be a star some day!” I said
Continue ReadingHydrogen, Helium… I don’t take these words lightly
Continue ReadingSuperman is taking a midnight stroll past a church when a priest runs down the steps. “Superman, Can you help me move some old coffins up some stairs”? he asks. “Are you crazy”? shouts Superman. “I can’t go in the crypt tonight”!
Continue ReadingMy wife looked at me funny earlier. Lazy eye.
Continue ReadingI am moving to a new school and I know the other kids do “mum” jokes I don’t know how they are going to make fun of me though I have two dads
Continue ReadingSee. Smell. Taste. Feel. I think I can adhere to that.
Continue ReadingI did some odd jobs around the house today. I vacuumed the ceiling, painted the oven and built a new door-way.
Continue ReadingOn a recent trip to Australia, I witnessed a shark sunbathing in a fever of cartilaginous fishes. It was Basking in the Rays.
Continue ReadingI asked my nephew what he wanted for his birthday and he asked for a Bat mobile… Well unbeknownst to me, one of them was still alive when I hung it over it his bed.
Continue ReadingIronically The One Show is The One Show I always avoid on TV
Continue ReadingI just rang the emergency services and said, “There’s just been an explosion at the prosthetic limb factory where I work..!” They asked, “Is it bad, sir?” I said, “Don’t worry, it looks a lot worse than it is.”
Continue ReadingI used to be in a band called Amoeba, but we split.
Continue ReadingI like to create lists which mix English and Latin, like: one, two, three, et cetera.
Continue Reading“What’s your name?” “Johnson.” “And your first name?” “It’s always been Johnson.”
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