Sky News: Young Brit Achi …
Sky News: Young Brit Achieves ‘Crazy’ Everest Dream So finally they’ve agreed triple glazing could work?
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
My Dad gave me the advice …
My Dad gave me the advice that; “Friends are the people who come to bail you out of prison, but true friends are the ones sitting next to you in the cell”. That’s why I only befriend rapists and murderers.
Continue ReadingI’ve just set fire to my …
I’ve just set fire to my neighbour’s car. That’ll teach him for saying I don’t take criticism well.
Continue ReadingBirth, the only instance …
Birth, the only instance when two heads aren’t better than one.
Continue ReadingWhat do you call a bears …
What do you call a bears with no ears? B
Continue ReadingI was fingering this bird …
I was fingering this bird at work yesterday, and we got caught. So much for promotion at the pet shop eh?
Continue ReadingMC Hammer. What a tool. …
MC Hammer. What a tool.
Continue ReadingWhat do lesbians need to …
What do lesbians need to become bar owners? A licker licence.
Continue ReadingI asked my mum what she w …
I asked my mum what she wanted for her birthday. She said she wanted a sky box. As luck would have it I’ve just had sky fitted and I have still got the box.
Continue ReadingI cant believe it!… Mon …
I cant believe it!… Monday night I was watching Keith Allen interview Keith Floyd then on Tuesday morning Keith Floyd drops dead!… Any chance Keith can interview his daughter Lily in the next programme?…
Continue ReadingAs punishment for my rece …
As punishment for my recent puns, the wife made me make dessert; I mixed a combination of tomato paste and icing sugar, ladled it onto a pastry base and served it. “This must have been a lot of effort” She responded drily when served her slice. “On the contrary; it was a pizza cake” I […]
Continue ReadingI would never work as a b …
I would never work as a big issue seller, it’s so badly paid, everyone who does it seems to end up homeless.
Continue Reading‘Body in the bag MI6 Spy …
‘Body in the bag MI6 Spy Gareth Williams may never be solved’. Maybe after an argument, his boyfriend packed him in.
Continue ReadingI call my new girlfriend …
I call my new girlfriend ‘Bad fruit shop’ because she’s got no melons
Continue ReadingSince I started working f …
Since I started working for Trebor I’ve made a mint…
Continue Reading