I broke the cars suspensi …
I broke the cars suspension today going over one of those sleeping police man. Well he looked like he was sleeping after the second go.
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“Black Is Beautiful” wel …
“Black Is Beautiful” well if that’s the case I’ve just shat a masterpiece.
Continue ReadingI cried as my Nan called …
I cried as my Nan called my brother an ambulance today. Her Alzheimer’s is getting worse.
Continue ReadingA single punch can kill. …
A single punch can kill. If you lace it with enough antifreeze.
Continue ReadingSeen the latest Bollywood …
Seen the latest Bollywood Blockbuster? Lethal Injection 2….
Continue ReadingI ran over some stupid bl …
I ran over some stupid black guy today. Still not sure why he was lying on my treadmill…
Continue ReadingI remember i once went to …
I remember i once went to see my nan as a little boy. The trainers with the lights in the heel were cool, but the spongebob dungarees didnt suit her.
Continue ReadingMy friends and I were Got …
My friends and I were Goths in high school. During lunch we’d sit by ourselves and plot a defense against the invading Hunnic Empire.
Continue ReadingMy mate said to me about …
My mate said to me about if you change the G and N around in ginger, we did laugh. God knows what a gigner is though, but I didn’t want to seem stupid.
Continue ReadingA lot of girls on faceboo …
A lot of girls on facebook aren’t giving men credit for their intelligence! “I’m selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle”… Of course you are, you’re female.
Continue ReadingI told my girlfriend that …
I told my girlfriend that if she married me, i’d show her the stars. She did, and the black eyes prove it.
Continue ReadingI went for an interview a …
I went for an interview at a leading DIY superstore today and they’ve just rung to offer me a post. I must say I’d have prefered a job.
Continue ReadingI saw a joke earlier post …
I saw a joke earlier posted by “insanity”: “If you kill anyone who has been unemployed for over 3 months, then wouldn’t that have the result of zero unemployment and the end of the recession?” I can’t help but notice the irony of that being posted at 1:30pm on a Wednesday
Continue ReadingBought an ice-cream from …
Bought an ice-cream from an Australian earlier. I had a 66.
Continue ReadingI went to a bookstore and …
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman: “Where’s the self-help section?” She said that if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
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