I recently dislocated my hip playing rugby, and when i went to the hospital the doctor told me he would have to do some complicated and extensive surgery to fix the problem. But it turns out he was just pulling my leg
Continue ReadingWent round to my girlfriends father last night and asked if I could marry his Daughter “Ask her Mother” he said “Nah I would rather marry your Daughter” I said
Continue Readingrecursion: n. See recursion.
Continue ReadingLast night me and my mates got drunk at the top of a bungee jumping platform, Today we all had a horrible hangover.
Continue ReadingI can’t believe Eddie Stobart’s dead. Sad news. I thought he was here for the long haul.
Continue ReadingSaw a sign at the doctors. TIME WASTED THIS WEEK DUE TO UNATTENDED APPOINTMENTS: 12 HOURS Fair play to them! If a customer doesn’t show up, why not get drunk?
Continue ReadingHmm… Revising… There’s quite a bit to learn in Biology… But that’s life, I guess…
Continue ReadingSickipedia’s connection loss to the database is more frequent than Fritzl’s incest runs.
Continue ReadingCan anyone help – I can’t remember if you have to report it to the police if you run over a dog. Any advice would be welcome. Also can you tell me if I can keep her purse.
Continue ReadingBowler’s union strikes.
Continue ReadingWhat do you call someone made from a tonne of clay? Clayton.
Continue ReadingI’ve invented a new hair dye range that is only available for people in supervisory positions. It’s called ‘Just Foremen’.
Continue ReadingWhen I see homeless people on the streets with their empty cups, I like to chip in. It’s certainly cheaper than crazy golf.
Continue ReadingWhat did Batman say to South Africa? Nice cape.
Continue ReadingA bloke walks into a sandwich shop and says “Cheese sandwich please”. The guy behind the counter says “With relish?”. The bloke replies “Why I would just love one of your delicious cheese sandwiches my good man”.
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