I’m taking my son to the …
I’m taking my son to the pictures this weekendfor his tenth birthday. I’ve never known someone get so excited about an art gallery.
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The average human body co …
The average human body contains enough bones to make up an entire human skeleton.
Continue ReadingMy father worked in a ste …
My father worked in a steel fabrication plant. They didn’t produce anything, they just said they did.
Continue ReadingMy daughter’s very demand …
My daughter’s very demanding…..usually for me to stop.
Continue ReadingTwo wrongs never make a r …
Two wrongs never make a right, unless its a double negative.
Continue ReadingThe boss called me into h …
The boss called me into his office today and told me I’m due for a raise. He handed me a packet of yeast and I walked back into the bakery.
Continue ReadingSince I gave my mate Dan …
Since I gave my mate Dan an ‘E’ he changed. He’s Dean now.
Continue ReadingI wish I could get my CRB …
I wish I could get my CRB check deleted as quick as my jokes.
Continue ReadingI hear the secret to a go …
I hear the secret to a good joke is perfect timing. 00:09
Continue ReadingMy mate reckons due to in …
My mate reckons due to increasing suicide rates, belts are set to be banned. Brace yourselves.
Continue ReadingNothing beats the taste o …
Nothing beats the taste of freshly baked cakes in the oven
Continue ReadingIf smoking makes you thin …
If smoking makes you thin and drinking makes you fat, then I have a perfectly healthy and balanced diet.
Continue ReadingI once knew a nun who lik …
I once knew a nun who liked to wear lots of different colours. Come to think of it, she had a lot of unusual habits.
Continue ReadingFool people into thinking …
Fool people into thinking you are going to make a funny joke, then don’t.
Continue ReadingHave you ever noticed how …
Have you ever noticed how the top and bottom biscuit’s in the packet are always broken? I don’t know why they bother putting them in.
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