Author: qjoq.com

I’ve just opened a pub at the highest point in Northern Ireland. It’s called Top Of The Mourne Inn.

I’m not normally one for double negatives, but when it comes to photos of your daughter in the bath, they’re a must.

Is it just me…… or does anybody else find pressing F5 refreshing?

BBC News – “Beautiful boat girl mourned.” I’ve seen the pictures and it was a lovely craft.

My allergy to dairy products is ruining my life and I’ve decided to end it all. I’m going to take a cloverdose.

Just opened a clothes shop with the lowest prices around. I’ve been thanked by a few midgets for putting the cost signs on the floor.

There I was, thinking Wretch 32 had legitimately sampled the song ‘Fool’s Gold’ By The Stone Roses; even that made me angry. Imagine my utter disgust when I discovered he Pyrited it.

What do you call a good and bad stock cube? An Oxomoron.

I’m a pool player. I always chat up girls when I go swimming.

I just robbed a load of musical instruments from a shop in town. It was easy, everything went accordion to plan.

I thought it would be a nice idea if I treated the wife today. She can now look as wooden as she acts in bed.