I’ve just been to a resta …
I’ve just been to a restaurant and I saw a sign on the door saying, ‘Look out for our new menu’. I walked in and it hit me in the face.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
I had an out of body expe …
I had an out of body experience yesterday. I was completely beside myself.
Continue ReadingI want to get tickets for …
I want to get tickets for the Hammerfall tour advertised on Sickipedia. Not because I think they’re any good, But because I would really like to go back to May 2010.
Continue ReadingJanuary is such a long mo …
January is such a long month. So I’ve started using the abbreviation “Jan” instead..
Continue ReadingSky News: Jimmy Nail In H …
Sky News: Jimmy Nail In Hospital With Lung Cancer. Oh well, may as well stick another nail in the coffin.
Continue ReadingI think that I’ve got ath …
I think that I’ve got athletes foot. My feet don’t smell bad, they’ve gone black.
Continue ReadingWhatever you do, always g …
Whatever you do, always give 100%. Unless you’re donating blood.
Continue ReadingCarbon footprint ad: ‘Dri …
Carbon footprint ad: ‘Drive 5 miles less and reduce your carbon footprint’ good advice… but how exactly do I get to work?
Continue ReadingMy son claims he is over …
My son claims he is over his childish obsession with prehistoric creatures and says he is concentrating on schoolwork I dont believe him though – Ive just seen him reading a book called the saurus
Continue ReadingI like my women how I lik …
I like my women how I like my guns; Silenced and spitting out my load.
Continue ReadingMy girlfriend is leaving …
My girlfriend is leaving me for the most ridiculous reason. Apparently I am addicted to cricket. Oh well I suppose we had a good innings.
Continue ReadingHobbies Include running t …
Hobbies Include running through parks and photography. Well it sounds better then Flashing in the park.
Continue ReadingMy wife just ran into the …
My wife just ran into the house. I can’t believe she didn’t see it.
Continue ReadingWhat do you call a French …
What do you call a French potato that smokes? A Paris Piper.
Continue ReadingI thought I was the coole …
I thought I was the coolest kid when I was younger because everyone dressed like me. Until I realised school uniform was mandatory.
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