Unicorns are basically ho …
Unicorns are basically horses with strap-ons…
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
It’s boring to hear peopl …
It’s boring to hear people make jokes about me being a drover that works with cattle. Because I herd them already.
Continue ReadingI went to Zambia and aske …
I went to Zambia and asked 83 guys about random, pointless surveys.
Continue ReadingAlways be frank with your …
Always be frank with your boss. That way when you screw up, Frank gets the blame.
Continue ReadingI called one of my employ …
I called one of my employees into my office for a review. I told him that I was quite satisfied about his work, and said to him: ‘what about a pay raise between eight and nine hundred quid?’ ‘Wow’, he said, that would be great’ ‘OK’, I replied, ‘8 quid it is then’
Continue ReadingI told an antisemitic jok …
I told an antisemitic joke to a Jew whilst in a mine. He was deeply offended.
Continue ReadingMy son is so stupid somet …
My son is so stupid sometimes. I’m just glad he’s not mine. Well, not geographically anyway.
Continue ReadingMein Kampf. Contains “Ado …
Mein Kampf. Contains “Adolf humour”
Continue ReadingSince my marriage ended, …
Since my marriage ended, I’ve not got a penny to my name. She has gone back to using her maiden name.
Continue ReadingOn my way out the door, t …
On my way out the door, the wife has just shouted, “It’s earth day, today.” I said, ” It’s always earth day but can we have it with chips tonight instead.”
Continue ReadingThank God for public phon …
Thank God for public phone boxes as I still use them. They’re the only places I can talk in private on my mobile these days.
Continue ReadingOh Cul de sacs. They take …
Oh Cul de sacs. They take me back.
Continue ReadingBecause of our lack of cl …
Because of our lack of clean clothes, my wife decided to put on the washing machine. Now she looks ridiculous!
Continue ReadingI just went to the chip s …
I just went to the chip shop. It’s a small branch of the old block shop.
Continue ReadingI wish I never touched th …
I wish I never touched that cloning machine. I don’t know how I can live with myself.
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