The Kettle said to the Po …
The Kettle said to the Pot “Is it because I is black?”
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I regret calling my son ‘ …
I regret calling my son ‘Curiosity’ ever since we got our cat.
Continue ReadingWent for a job interview …
Went for a job interview today but I didn’t get it because apparently I don’t understand basic business. I told them they could stick their job, I wouldn’t work for them if they paid me
Continue ReadingA man goes into a library …
A man goes into a library and asks for a book with a surprise ending. The librarian gives it to him.
Continue Readingfacebook status: Andy Smi …
facebook status: Andy Smith doesn’t like people switching between first and third person on their facebook status, in fact I hate it.
Continue ReadingI was having a pint in th …
I was having a pint in the pub last night when I noticed a bloke standing on his own by the pool table. I walked over to him and said, “You look bored, do you fancy a playing a game?” “Yeah, go on then” he replied. I tapped him on the shoulder and ran off […]
Continue ReadingI read a book called “The …
I read a book called “The Swimming Pool”. It started off shallow but had a very deep end to it.
Continue Reading“Hey, do you want to hear …
“Hey, do you want to hear a funny joke about cloakroom attendants?” “No!” “I’ll get your coat..”
Continue ReadingSKY NEWS: Riot in Belgium …
SKY NEWS: Riot in Belgium: Kurds Clash With Police I always said yellow wasn’t their colour.
Continue Readingh The middle of nowhere …
h The middle of nowhere
Continue ReadingI took my mate to the par …
I took my mate to the park the other day, he got drunk and started swinging for me. It was hilarious, I watched him on the slide and climbing frame as well.
Continue ReadingI used to be firmly again …
I used to be firmly against surgery, but then I had a change of heart.
Continue ReadingI’ve been overlooked for …
I’ve been overlooked for the vacant managers position at my sealife center again, but now instead of fishtank supervisor, I’ve been made Crab supervisor. I think I’m being moved sideways.
Continue ReadingThey say nothing is certa …
They say nothing is certain, How do they know?
Continue ReadingSome of these maths Puns …
Some of these maths Puns just don’t add up, I wish the Mods would take away them as its causing a big divide.
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