Is it just me that has no …
Is it just me that has no clue who Megatron is? I evened wikipedia-ed him and still don’t get the jokes.
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Rebecca Black’s Friday ha …
Rebecca Black’s Friday has been removed because they found she had misrepresented herself in the song by claiming she had ‘friends’.
Continue ReadingI said, “How long left re …
I said, “How long left ref?” He said, “It’s injury time” So I broke his nose.
Continue ReadingI just couldn’t get rid o …
I just couldn’t get rid of a horrible headache earlier today, or the ‘wife’ as she prefers to be called.
Continue ReadingThe newspapers this week …
The newspapers this week have given extensive coverage to the fact that a black man has set a record for running 150 metres down a street in Manchester. However, they failed to mention the fact that he did it with a video under one arm and 5 police dogs chasing after him.
Continue ReadingA dog’s not just for Chri …
A dog’s not just for Christmas ………. It’s for finding dead bodies when out for a walk
Continue ReadingAt the airport they asked …
At the airport they asked me if anybody I didn’t know gave me anything. Even the people I know don’t give me anything.
Continue ReadingI was watching the home s …
I was watching the home shopping channel when it said” Forget eveything you know about washing machines” It was a load of my mind.
Continue ReadingI asked some girl I pulle …
I asked some girl I pulled last night how she liked her eggs in the morning and she replied “fried, not fertilised”. So I set fire to her flat before leaving the next day.
Continue ReadingI got fired, and I’m bein …
I got fired, and I’m being taken to court, just for falling asleep once on the job. I don’t see a point in co pilots if I’m honest.
Continue ReadingI’ve just emailed “This i …
I’ve just emailed “This is a robbery!” to my online bank support. What’s the procedure? Do they just put the money in my account or do I have to wait for an email back?
Continue ReadingLast night I played a bla …
Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.
Continue ReadingDear, Lonely Hearts. Body …
Dear, Lonely Hearts. Body builder, seeks electrifying time. Dr. Frankenstein.
Continue ReadingMy wife was preparing som …
My wife was preparing some potatoes for our dinner, I asked “What time is dinner?” but she made no reply. That’s the first time she’s ever been quiet a peeling.
Continue ReadingTalkSport – The Sun for p …
TalkSport – The Sun for people who can’t read.
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