Someone just threw a bag …
Someone just threw a bag cocaine in my face It really cracked me up
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
Has anyone else noticed t …
Has anyone else noticed that its always the guys without girlfriends that win arm wrestles.
Continue ReadingI have always wanted to b …
I have always wanted to be a comedian………….but im scared of being laughed at.
Continue ReadingAll black people should b …
All black people should be killed by firing squad at birth .. Sorry, I meant racists. All black people should be killed by racists at birth.
Continue ReadingCops recently took photos …
Cops recently took photos of each other sitting on the Queen’s throne whilst on duty at Buckingham Palace. It’s lucky the Queen didn’t catch them. As she’d have got a slap in the face and a baton to the legs.
Continue ReadingApparently I have made 14 …
Apparently I have made 144 mistakes at work this past year and they said enough was enough, I got fired for gross negligence..
Continue ReadingPutting petrol into a die …
Putting petrol into a diesel car is like pouring Gin into a woman. You’re guaranteed at some point in the night, she’s going to breakdown.
Continue ReadingMy boys were getting a ca …
My boys were getting a caricature at the fair when they started fighting. “Can you break them apart mate?” the guy asked. “Nah,” I replied, “I don’t want to get drawn into this.”
Continue ReadingI get fed up of seeing dr …
I get fed up of seeing drinking under ‘activities’ on Facebook walls. I mean, it’s obvious isn’t it? If not, they’d die of dehydration.
Continue ReadingI had a one night stand w …
I had a one night stand with a stewardess on a budget airline last night. Easy come easy go.
Continue ReadingSimon Weston got really u …
Simon Weston got really upset and started crying when I told him my joke about burns victims. Guess I must have hit a cooked nerve.
Continue ReadingBeing a nihilist has brou …
Being a nihilist has brought so much meaning to my life.
Continue ReadingI hear the prices of hoov …
I hear the prices of hoovers has gone up, that sucks.
Continue ReadingSaw this man by the side …
Saw this man by the side of the road blowing a flute at a snake in a basket. Thought to myself “Well that’s just charming!”
Continue ReadingThat film ‘Contagion’ sou …
That film ‘Contagion’ sounds good. I hope to catch it at some point this week.
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