Author: qjoq.com

As a courtroom judge, I spend a lot of my time around two types of people. The guilty. And the innocent. It’s very much a case of black and white.

I saw a Jamaican guy with dreadlocks in the street earlier. He was smoking a huge joint and shouting out, “Death to the Jews! End the welfare state!” Yeah man. Rastafaright.

My mate almost achieved his life-long ambition of eating every Cadbury’s chocolate bar in one sitting. He was so close, just a Whisper away.

I was stuck in traffic yesterday on the M6 and saw a sign “Roadworks Ahead- Delays possible until Feb 2010”. Fortunately I was only held up for 7 hours.

I was helping my old nan clean the rubbish out of her house. I asked her, “Where’s the bin go nan?” She replied, “Mecca, down the high street son.”

I invited a load of soldiers around to our office canteen for lunch yesterday. It made a mess.

When trying on new clothes i go to a different cubicle every time. This is because i like changing rooms.