Generalizing works for mo …
Generalizing works for most people.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
I always carry a rubber i …
I always carry a rubber in my wallet just incase. So far it’s never been used my spelling is pretty good!
Continue ReadingI’ve been trying to hire …
I’ve been trying to hire a librarian. But they’re all fully booked.
Continue ReadingI dumped my girlfriend at …
I dumped my girlfriend at the top of the Eiffel Tower. She’s always wanted to go on a romantic break.
Continue ReadingA true friend stabs you i …
A true friend stabs you in the front.
Continue ReadingMy wife said ” We don’t s …
My wife said ” We don’t seem to understand each other these days. Why can’t we just get along?” “A long what?” I asked.
Continue ReadingWhat do you call a deer w …
What do you call a deer with no eyes? Pedigree chum.
Continue ReadingOn crimewatch they are pl …
On crimewatch they are pleading for us to ring them and help give them names, so I thought I’d co-operate. They just said I wasted police time, I think Robert the rapist is a brilliant name myself.
Continue ReadingSo to recap, I put the to …
So to recap, I put the top back on my pen.
Continue ReadingI don’t know why everyone …
I don’t know why everyone complains about petrol being so dear at 1.40 a litre. It’s 15 for a litre of Vodka!
Continue ReadingI visited the particle ph …
I visited the particle physics laboratory, CERN, in Geneva the other day. I signed up for the tour, and found out to my pleasant surprise that the tour guide was an attractive young research student. I was going to go for it, but it got a bit awkward when she noticed my hadron.
Continue ReadingI’ve recently bought a ne …
I’ve recently bought a new mobile phone, its got all the latest gadgets, Internet, camera, MP3 player, etc. Now to find someone to call.
Continue ReadingDid you go see Sarcasm, t …
Did you go see Sarcasm, the Movie? No, we just hung round the cinema for two hours.
Continue Reading“Dad, can you do my maths …
“Dad, can you do my maths homework for me?” “No son, it wouldn’t be right.” “Well, at least you could try.”
Continue ReadingI’ve just broke up with m …
I’ve just broke up with my optometrist girlfriend. She was two-eye maintenance.
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