I had a night on the tile …
I had a night on the tiles last night. I fell asleep on my scrabble board.
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Everytime Garth Crooks po …
Everytime Garth Crooks pops up on Match of the Day I can’t help but think “maybe it’s a good thing more black people don’t have jobs”.
Continue ReadingWe’ve all been told to fe …
We’ve all been told to feel sorry for the homeless, but how can we when they have better Christmas lights than we do
Continue ReadingBeing the gentleman that …
Being the gentleman that I am, I offered a seat to a lady on the bus today. The person sitting there wasn’t too happy though.
Continue ReadingWhat’s the difference bet …
What’s the difference between Call of Duty: Black Ops and a restaurant? A restaurant usually has a good host and servers that work.
Continue ReadingI’m the breadwinner. Thes …
I’m the breadwinner. These Bakery raffles are getting boring now.
Continue ReadingSometimes, I really hate …
Sometimes, I really hate myself. But that’s just life when you’re a racist chameleon.
Continue ReadingThe White House, oh the i …
The White House, oh the irony…
Continue ReadingI turned down the chance …
I turned down the chance to take free yoga lessons. I think I made the right choice, I won’t be kicking myself after a few weeks.
Continue ReadingWell it looks like I’ll b …
Well it looks like I’ll be up to my neck in paperwork again tonight. Although it’s not so bad sleeping rough when it’s the summer.
Continue ReadingI’m starting my new job a …
I’m starting my new job at Deed Poll next week. I’m hoping to make a name for myself.
Continue ReadingI got an e-mail saying ‘A …
I got an e-mail saying ‘At Google Earth we can read maps backwards!’ I thought, “That’s just spam.”
Continue ReadingSKY SPORTS: Alan Pardew i …
SKY SPORTS: Alan Pardew is the new newcastle manager. A man who’s seen the sack more times than george michaels chin !
Continue ReadingI got punched yesterday. …
I got punched yesterday. It was the longest word on the scrabble board.
Continue ReadingI often use big words to …
I often use big words to sound smart; I mean utilizing gargantuan idioms to fabricate intelligence.
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