Author: qjoq.com

My mate got hit in the head by a jar of Nescafe that fell off a lorry. It was instant death.

I met this woman at an African Charity event last night. She said ‘Me and my husband are giving people.” I said “Try giving water instead, they seem to prefer that.”

Microsoft has released its new operating system, the Windows 7. I still think that sounds more like a double glazing terrorist group.

My mate Leroy’s favourite group is Take That.

Due to alcohol abuse I liver damaged lifestyle.

Just read on the BBC website about an old woman in Durham who set up a gym inside an old clapped out single decker bus. Wonder if she’ll be taking the sessions herself or bringing in some experienced coaches.

A friend of mine asked me to be usher at his wedding last week. But when I blacked up, stripped off my shirt and sang R&B, he wasn’t very happy.

For future reference, please see a clairvoyant.

I hated school. My English teacher said that I would never amount to anything. I said to him, “Mark my words… that’s your job.”