SportsDirect.com – Adidas …
SportsDirect.com – Adidas Trainers half price sale now on. Maximum 3 per customer. Great if you’ve got 3 legs or come from Norfolk then.
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I was speeding down a poo …
I was speeding down a poorly lit dual carriageway last night. It’s a good job they have those yellow boxes which flash to show you the edge of the road.
Continue ReadingBIG BROTHER: Davina: “Ok, …
BIG BROTHER: Davina: “Ok, we’re just heading back to the house for our last ever instalment of celebrity big brother, so have your tissues at the ready.” Imagine my disapointment when it didn’t cut to Stephanie Beacham getting spit-roasted by Vinnie and Dane. That’s the last time I listen to Davina.
Continue ReadingI just met a really depre …
I just met a really depressed worm. He had lost his other half.
Continue ReadingSo Sarah Harding is off i …
So Sarah Harding is off into rehab. Someone told me there’s no girls aloud in rehab?
Continue ReadingWife came back from the h …
Wife came back from the hospital in a right state. Said shed been diagnosed with a lump in her breast. I sat her down and told her how when I get lumps in my porridge it narks me no end as well. I went on to say the situation could be much serious, like she […]
Continue ReadingIsn’t it ironic Portsmout …
Isn’t it ironic Portsmouth’s main sponsor’s ‘Jobsite’ will get most use out of the players in a few weeks.
Continue ReadingI took part in an egg-and …
I took part in an egg-and-spoon race and won it with ease. Those eggs and spoons had no chance against me.
Continue ReadingWhat do you call someone …
What do you call someone who’s always late for work? Mr. Buss
Continue ReadingRight , I’m off to the IT …
Right , I’m off to the ITV studios . I’m gonna be the first one in line for tomorrow’s one night stand with pixie Lott.
Continue ReadingMy wife left me this afte …
My wife left me this afternoon. She phoned and said something that made me think she’s not coming back. She said “I’m not coming back”.
Continue ReadingI recently got a job as W …
I recently got a job as Werewolf. It’s only part time.
Continue ReadingTerrible news about today …
Terrible news about today’s Peshawar explosion. There’s naan bread all over my kitchen.
Continue ReadingNew Wiliksons Sword hydro …
New Wiliksons Sword hydro razor with water activated gel molecules. Maybe, just maybe, the water you feel from the ‘water activated gel molecules’ is the very same water needed to activate them.
Continue ReadingI bought a specially made …
I bought a specially made book on bondage techniques. It’s bound to work.
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