Just bought a new pair of …
Just bought a new pair of boxer shorts. I spoil that dog something rotten.
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12 shot dead at “soldier readiness station”. Well, they weren’t ready for that were they?
Continue ReadingI think my local Butcher …
I think my local Butcher has caught onto the fact that I’ve been sleeping with his wife, since he’s been giving me disgusting looks and completely ignoring me lately. Today, I went in and asked for a prime cut of beef, and asked how his day was going. He gave me a cold shoulder.
Continue ReadingFollowing his performance …
Following his performance at the Masters golf today, Ian Poulter said he needs to shoot a round in the 60’s if he’s to have any chance to winning tomorrow. Looking at your dress sense Ian, I think you’re already there.
Continue ReadingI used to work at a car g …
I used to work at a car garage that had a jet wash. It was pointless, there was nowhere for them to land.
Continue ReadingI like to eat fish every …
I like to eat fish every day off the week… Baramundi
Continue ReadingSo now they’ve got Lynx f …
So now they’ve got Lynx for women! But how often have women said, “Mmmm, is that Lynx you’re wearing?”.
Continue ReadingI volunteered recently to …
I volunteered recently to perform a parachute jump for charity. On our first day of training, the instructor made an important point about preparing for landing at 300 feet. “How do you know when you’re at 300 feet?” asked one woman. “A good question,” replied the instructor. “At 300 feet you can recognize the faces […]
Continue ReadingA clich walks into a bar. …
A clich walks into a bar…
Continue ReadingDid you know that the blu …
Did you know that the bluetooth mobile headset was invented by a German man? Hans Free.
Continue ReadingThere’d be a certain iron …
There’d be a certain irony if Hugh Hefner died from Myxomatosis.
Continue ReadingIt’s all fun and games un …
It’s all fun and games until the fat kid joins the pile on..
Continue ReadingLike most people my heigh …
Like most people my height, I’m bored of people re-wording other peoples jokes.
Continue ReadingI’ve just made a new soci …
I’ve just made a new social networking site for wife beaters, it’s a hit.
Continue ReadingOn a fishing trip to Aust …
On a fishing trip to Australia, I was terrified when the biggest croc I’d ever seen came floating past the boat. Must have been a size 16 at least.
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