Why do so many buses go t …
Why do so many buses go to Sorry Not In Service? It can’t be a popular place ‘cos they are always empty.
Continue ReadingI’ve been working on prod …
I’ve been working on producing a 4D film for years now, but I just haven’t got the time.
Continue ReadingI’m allergic to The Fonz. …
I’m allergic to The Fonz. I’ve got HeeeyyyFever.
Continue ReadingI know one day Emile Hesk …
I know one day Emile Heskey will do something useful with his boots. And hang them up…
Continue ReadingThey say you’re only 8 fe …
They say you’re only 8 feet away from a five-a-side team.
Continue ReadingStatistics show 11/9 joke …
Statistics show 11/9 jokes about dyslexic Americans make people laugh.
Continue ReadingI walked into a room of o …
I walked into a room of optimists earlier, It was half full.
Continue ReadingI guess “stop, drop and r …
I guess “stop, drop and roll” doesn’t apply when you’re on a beach off the Gulf of Mexico…
Continue ReadingAs my wife read the winni …
As my wife read the winning lotto numbers off the ticket she said, “Pinch me to make sure I’m not dreaming!” “It’s that ticket I’ll be pinching thank you fatty,” I replied, “My quid paid for it.”
Continue ReadingI went in a butchers toda …
I went in a butchers today and said ” pound of bacon please” the butcher said ” lean back?” so I said ” why, have i got dog breath or something?”
Continue ReadingI was wondering what happ …
I was wondering what happened to Ask Jeeves, So I googled it.
Continue ReadingI’m not politically corre …
I’m not politically correct, but my gollywog is.
Continue ReadingDoes it still count as go …
Does it still count as good luck when you run over two magpies?
Continue ReadingThe term ‘paedophile’ sic …
The term ‘paedophile’ sickens me.. I’m an amateur gynaecologist that specialises in paediatrics
Continue ReadingI’m supposed to be going …
I’m supposed to be going on a date with a hot virgin tonight, but… She couldn’t find a babysitter.
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