I was at the cinema with the wife when I noticed a load of 50 pound notes on the floor. I picked them up and said to the missus, “Here put these down your knickers until we get out.”
After the film finished and we got out I said to her, “Give me that money then.”
She felt into her knickers and said, “Oh my god. It’s gone. It must have been that bloke sat next to me.”
I said, “Why did you let some bloke put his hand in your knickers?”
She replied, “Well I wasn’t to know he was a thief.”