Just bought a block of ch …
Just bought a block of cheddar…it’s destined for grateness!
Continue ReadingJust bought a block of cheddar…it’s destined for grateness!
Continue ReadingI’d love to see the excitement, and then the utter disappointment, on the starving Africans faces, when the BBC are filming for Comic Relief and they tell them they are about to do a ‘live feed’.
Continue ReadingI just bought a round green jacket with a brown stem. Its an Apple Mac.
Continue ReadingI knew a shepherd once… He was brilliant in his field.
Continue ReadingI’ve started selling Lions for a living. I’m doing a roaring trade at the moment.
Continue ReadingThere was a naked mental patient standing by the roundabout earlier frantically waving at drivers. If you ask me, he was a stark waving lunatic.
Continue ReadingI thought Davy Jones was just sleeping. Then I saw his face… Now I’m a bereaver.
Continue ReadingWhen he was 6 months old, my son used to ride on the London underground all day long. He was a test-tube baby.
Continue ReadingEverytime I use my phone my ear gets wet. I think it’s been tapped.
Continue ReadingI was meant to catch up with an old Kenyan friend today. But even at sixty, he was still too fast.
Continue ReadingMy Dad used to be pretty good at drawing. He shot my Mum dead before she’d even noticed him reach for his pistol.
Continue ReadingI have six words for you
Continue ReadingI love my fingers… …I always know i can count on them.
Continue ReadingI nicked some copper wire last night. The local bobby was furious he couldn’t turn his lights on.
Continue ReadingWhich part of a man grows and grows the more you stroke it? His ego.
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