Category: science

Gravity gets me down, man.

All these different shops are getting ridiculous, Toys R Us, Carpets R Us. There’s one near me that sells right angled triangles. Pythag R Us

I was offered a job at CERN last week, to study particle physics. I lepton the chance.

I’ve invented a revolutionary new facebook craze – lying down in awkward places whilst emitting radiation not continuously, but in quanta. I call it plancking.

I like the word ‘Saturn’. It has a nice ring to it.

Newton’s little-known 4th Law of Motion – ‘However hard you shake it, the last drop always goes down your trouser leg’.

The Higgs Boson jokes bandwagon… who hasn’t Lepton?

Today during a Physics lesson I tried my best to figure out why a Black Hole is so called. All until my mate pointed out that they steal light and matter. Then I understood.

“Pablo, do you know the Chemical symbol for Silicon?” “Si Senor.”

Entropy…It’s not what it used to be.

when i was a kid, i can remember pulling sharply on the seat belt in dads car and it suddenly stopped, but when i pulled the seat belt slowly, it continued to unwind with no issues. So i asked my dad: Me: “Why does the seat belt do that?” Dad: “Inertia” Me: “Whats Inertia” Dad: […]

If they don’t find the Higgs Boson soon I don’t know how I am going to hold myself together.

Seriously, Michael Jackson didn’t have plastic surgery to become white. He was just the first black man in history to EVER have a shower…

Scientists have discovered a new element. It’s fragile, unstable and collapses every twenty minutes. They haven’t named it yet, but I suggest Kerry Katonium.

Scientists should use an internet tool to see if life exists on the newly discovered “twin planet”. Just use Google Kepler 22-b.