Category: sarcasm

Okay, I’ve figured it out: the more hair Nicholas Cage has, the better the movie.

It saddens me when people forget the true meaning of Easter. Chocolate eggs.

Religion repulses me and I do everything possible to ensure the feeling is mutual.

I see you liked your chin so much you decided to get another.

My wife says she’s leaving me because I’m sarcastic. I said, “That’s fantastic now I can post a style of joke that’s never been done before.”

Hate it when people hand over a picture and say, “Here’s a picture of me when I was younger”. Not exactly going to hand over a picture and say, “Here’s a picture of me when I was older”, are you?

FOOTLOOSE- Kevin Bacon plays a teenager who moves from Chicao to a small town where rock music and dancing is banned So he sticks two fingers up at the establishment… By dancing like a fairy in an abandoned warehouse. What a rebel

I just finished watching Clint Eastwood’s ‘Invictus’. I love films about real life events because you learn whilst enjoying the movie. For example, I never knew that Nelson Mandela was personally responsible for the South African’s rugby world cup win.

I’ve just brought my mate a 10 B&Q gift card… You never know when you might need a broom and three screws.

Sky News : ‘Apple Will Launch iPad Mini by Christmas’. Is that not just an iPod touch?

My girlfriend asked me if I find sarcasm funny. I said, “Oh yes, I find it so hilarious it makes me feel like my sides are about to split with uncontrollable laughter.”

I’ve no idea what’s going on with this weather. It’s gone really cold again just like it did last winter. Crazy.

I was in the pub at closing time with my mate last night, I said “can I borrow your phone please? I need to call a taxi and I’ve left my mobile at home” He said “sure, you can use my new iPhone” Anyway, to cut a long story short, it took me about half […]

The wife went out for five minutes to talk to a delivery man. She came back half an hour later and said “doesn’t time fly when your talking?” Not when your’re talking to me it doesn’t!

Read this joke by weeman160: According to BBC, University students can now take a course studying comedy. What a joke! ————————————————————– You might want to consider applying.