Category: one liner

Carlsberg don’t do gingers, no-one does.

I’m thinking of taking my girlfriend out tonight……..one bullet should do the job

I always get interrupted whenever I’m playing the Air Harp in public by people asking why I’ve summoned them over.

Men who have tools in a womans mouth arent always dentists…

Don’t buy a penny whistle from the pound shop – it’s a rip off.

specious wrote: “I’m so manly that even my sentences don’t have periods” — I should hope not. This is England and they’re called full stops.

And so, with a heavy heart, I explained to the wife that I’ve got too much iron in my blood.

Recent studies show that there were some studies done recently.

Apparently getting sucked off in Thailand doesn’t always have a happy ending

Don’t make the mistake I did. I took my kids to a heavy petting zoo.

How can you tell the Irishman aboard an aircraft carrier? He’s the one throwing bread to the helicopters.

I really thympathize with people who have lisps.

On wafer packets how do they describe how thin the wafer is?

Define irony ? Small doors at McDonald’s.

My son was crushed by a falling Lego tower.. He didn’t make it.