Category: joke

One day, two deputies in the Sheriff’s Office answered an emergency call at a farmhouse. When they walked in, they found the nude bodies of a man and a woman in the bedroom. They had been shot to death. When they went to the living room, they found the body of a man with a […]

Just got my results from E-Harmony.. They matched me with a computer chair and a tub of Vaseline.

I’ve been struggling to find work for six months. I knew I should never have opened that camouflage shop.

Whats the difference between a taxi driver and a potential rapist? Nothing

If my girlfriend sucked as much as my jokes, I wouldn’t have the time to be posting them here.

Jokes are like catholic choir boys – its hard to find one that hasn’t been done.

I went out for a few beers with my mates one Friday night and didn’t get back until the next Tuesday. When I arrived home my wife was really upset. It can’t have been me who upset her, I wasn’t even there.

I guess its ok to leave baby in the corner now.

SKY NEWS – Obama To Make First Official Visit To Oz. Scarecrow, Tin Man and Lion are stepping up security at the Emerald Palace.

Why don’t you see any woman ventriloquists? They don’t keep their mouths shut.

Man: ily Woman: Awww write the words in full they mean more when theyre written properly Man: Im leaving you

Hundreds stuck in snow on A9. Never play Battleships outdoors using people…

What do you call a self – centred Indian? An “attention Sikh-er”

Walking my dog this morning. My dog does a number two in the street, I walk past it as if nothings happened. “Oi!” A man shouted “You got to pick that up and put it in a bag. It’s filthy that is.” Poor thing almost suffocated.

My secretary just entered my office and said: ‘We got a letter again from our office in the Sahara. They’re writing that they have a very serious water shortage’ ‘Well’, I said, ‘there’s always a water shortage there – it can’t be that urgent’ ‘I think it’s urgent this time’, my secretary said, ‘the stamp […]