Category: irony

Virtue never has been as respected as money. That’s why i always prefer money.

I’ve been told that I need to stop abbreviating words but I just cba.

I find it ironic that people use words they don’t understand.

I bought a self-help tape the other day. It was called “How to handle disappointment.” When I opened the box, it was empty.

After hearing The FA comment on David Bentley’s drink driving ban, it gave me the idea that they are against footballers drinking alcohol. So why do they have the Carling Cup?

To the person who was driving the overturned car on the M1, the five fire engines, two police cars and an ambulance. I hope you’re happy now… …I’m gonna be late for work.

Isn’t it ironic that the staff at my local BP garage got really irritated when some oil leaked out of my car onto their forecourt the other day?

BBC Sport: Banned Barton “sorry” for punch Never have quotation marks been laced with such irony

Cee Lo Green: im sorry i cant afford a ferrarai its cos im black and i dont earn that much

Somebody accused me of being ‘stupid, immature, naive and downright ugly’ today. I told him that my recent birthday cards said otherwise – that told him.

True story, I saw some disabled people in a club called “Walkabout” last night. Irony?

My colleagues all think I’m posh. I’m not, I went to one of the roughest colleges in cambridge

Wednesdays are so depressing. Definitely up there in the top 7.

In love, you go to bed early. In marriage, you go to sleep early.

I’m against protesting, but I’m not sure how to show it