Category: difference

I ordered a new welcome mat and decided to have it delivered. I told them that, if I am not in just leave it by the front door. They said they could not leave a package outside as it might get stolen.

What do twins and fruit fetishists have in common? They both come in pears

What’s the difference between Jordan and the X Factor? The X Factor only had half a million entries this year

What’s the difference between the World Economy and Tommy Cooper ? Everybody laughed when Tommy Cooper collapsed

What is the difference between a bachelor and a married man? The bachelor comes home, sees what’s in the refrigerator, then goes to bed. The married man comes home, sees what’s in the bed, and goes to the refrigerator.

What’s the difference between women and computers? You can stick a floppy into a computer.

What is the difference between a white owl and a black owl? A white owl says “who”, “who” and a black owl says “who dat”, “who dat”.

What’s the difference between the KKK and the English government? One knows what its doing, and the other doesn’t have a klu.

Whats the difference between praying in a church and praying on the golf course? You really mean it when youre on the golf course…

I love playin rock, paper, scissors with quadrapeligics; they always go for rock

Ahhhhh……..Oral in the morning, Role play in the afternoon. I better start revising for these French tests.

What’s the difference between Ricky Ponting and a prison facial? One’s a convict chewing his gum and the other’s a convict gooing his chum.

What’s the difference between an American and a tub of lard? The tub.

Watching 8 out of 10 cats through my fingers – Jimmy Carr looks like he’s been crying. Hope they drop him and bring in someone we can feel comfortable with, like Michael Barrymore.

Q: How can you tell the difference between a happy sperm and an unhappy sperm? A: The happy sperm is the one with egg on his face.