Category: communication

Did you know that the mobile phone is the only thing in the world which blokes argue over who’s got the smallest?

Probably the single and most frustrating thing about social media websites like twitter, is the fact that you only get 140 characters to us

I bought at Enigma machine off eBay last week. I’m still trying to work the instructions out.

Life is too short to make mstakes

My idea for a perfect pint was a cool Fosters on the beach in Jamaica with Bob Marley. For some reason carling said I didn’t win.

When someone asks you for account details on the phone, “200 years old, sharp teeth, hates wooden stakes” is an unacceptable answer.

I met this really cute girl I thought was way out my league last week in a club. I thinks she was a bit drunk but it seemed to help and I got her phone number! Now she texts me all the time: ‘pls stop texting me’ ‘i dnt want u fllwing me agen’ ‘wht […]

I personally find the facebook ‘poke’ feature to be too informal and patiently await the introduction of the ‘molest’ option….

I was accused of being an immature coward today. “I know you are, but what am I?” I whispered, as I walked away.

Facebook is down. What im I going to do with my life?

Bank security checks are pretty pointless if you’re talking to an Indian customer. “Can I take your mother’s maiden name please Mr Patel?” “Yeah. It’s Patel.”

“Thank you for calling the Freedom of Speech hotline where we believe that it is every persons right to voice their opinions without fear of recrimination”. “Calls may be monitored”.

The bank just rang me with regards to my new current account. I must admit, I wasn’t very impressed with what I heard. A Paki’s voice.

What did 1 BlackBerry user say to the other Blackberry user? Nothing!

The wife said “I just can’t get through to you, it’s like were on different wavelengths!”…. “You daft cow.” I replied “your walkie talkie is on the wrong frequency!”