Category: communication

I’m more of a haha than an lol kinda person But sometimes I actually meet real people!

At work today this OAP costumer kept calling me duck… I thought to myself, if she calls me duck one more time I think I’m going to quack…

Even the families of staff at Clinton will be sending their loved one a sadface text message rather than forking out three quid on a card

“That letter you’ve been waiting for is here,” said my wife, “and you’ve got the job!” “Great!” I replied, “When do I start?” “3 weeks ago….”

My wife said she’s leaving me because ‘I’m not an effective communicator.’ I’ll e-mail her about it tomorrow.

I’ve still got my original Nokia 3310, I think it may be time to get rid of it. Apparently, I’ve to take it somewhere called ‘Mordor’

All my mates keep laughing at me because i’m on a Pay-As-You-Go mobile phone. So i took out a contract………And got them killed.

I went into the estate agents today I said “Hi, I wondered if you could help me I have a flat?” The estate agent said “Oh, are you looking to sell it?” I said “No, I’m looking to blow it back up.”

Apple really aren’t being very original with their technology. There was the iPod, a revolutionary product that changes the world of music but all they’ve done since is whack a phone on it and make it bigger… Maybe they should come up with a new iDeer.

Just saw a site “Learn Spanish: A Word A Day!” The average english persons vocabulary is about 25000 words… “Learn Spanish: In 68 Years!”

There is no way that the world is going to end on 21/12/2012 like the aztecs predicted. Sorry aztecs, wrong again, just like you were about the optimum method of ingesting chocolate. Makes you wonder what they were smoking.

It’s great having unlimited texts at Christmas and New Years… Now I just need some friends…

My wife and I had a close call this morning. I can’t believe she phoned me from next door.

I’ve started a mobile phone network that covers 1% of the UK. I’m going to sell it to Vodafone.

My girlfriend told me last night that I spend far too much time texting. I just tilted my head sideways and smiled at her.