Somebody snuck into my ho …
Somebody snuck into my house today and put a moist cloth on my calendar, which has really put a damper on my whole month.
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I just got a job in adver …
I just got a job in advertising. They’ve have asked me to sell protractors but im not sure what angle i should take.
Continue ReadingI saw some woman breast f …
I saw some woman breast feeding her baby in KFC today. She even give him a few pieces of the popcorn chicken from the mega bucket.
Continue ReadingHalf a coconut hung from …
Half a coconut hung from a tree makes a nutritious food for your garden birds. It also helps to keep other coconuts away from your house.
Continue ReadingMy daughter has been put …
My daughter has been put on the Olympic gymnastics team. She flipped when she found out.
Continue ReadingThe wife got a 200 Parrot …
The wife got a 200 Parrot for my birthday. Don’t know why it was so expensive though, there wasn’t even that much meat on it.
Continue ReadingI met a Chinese bloke who …
I met a Chinese bloke who looked green with envy the other day, but it turned out he was just feeling blue.
Continue ReadingHandy tip: Do not take of …
Handy tip: Do not take off your camouflage jacket in the woods.
Continue ReadingWIG WEARERS. Don’t waste …
WIG WEARERS. Don’t waste money on new wigs. Simply turn your old ones round for the ‘boy band’ look
Continue ReadingIt always makes me laugh …
It always makes me laugh how scared my dog is of the vacuum cleaner. Even so, it was a lot cheaper than getting a vet to do the abortion.
Continue ReadingVisited a fortune teller …
Visited a fortune teller yesterday and it really didnt go too well. Got chased down the road with her screaming after me. Could have sworn she said Cross my palm with saliva.
Continue ReadingMy undertaker business ha …
My undertaker business has recently gone bust. A rival company was running my business into the ground.
Continue ReadingA friend of mine is study …
A friend of mine is studying Third World Development. Surely there can’t be much money in it?
Continue ReadingI thought I saw a Robin R …
I thought I saw a Robin Red Breast in the park today. It turned out to be a sparrow with an exit wound.
Continue ReadingIf you don’t know your La …
If you don’t know your Latin imperfect endings, you have no Bant.
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