Author: qjoq.com

My wife’s leaving me because of the all the jokes I make about blind people. I can not see what she’s on about.

Went to a seminar about getting rid of doubt last night. I don’t think it worked.

Cat Flaps; apparently not the most romantic name for my girlfriend’s “downstairs”.

My mum never let me play with scissors when I was younger. I could only use rock or paper.

I tried to give my rubbish to a refuse collector but he wouldn’t accept it.

I remember when the policeman asked me if I was going to come quietly. I said, “I’ll try, but those handcuffs really excite me.”

I’m going to start a business that installs nitrous boosters to armoured trucks. I’ll be laughing all the way to the bank.