My dad has loads of photo …
My dad has loads of photos of his blood vessels around the house. He’s so vein.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
I see a lucky group share …
I see a lucky group shared in the Euromillions Jackpot then, Mr & Mrs Weir, Macdonalds, KFC, Burger King, Pizza hut, Aziz’s kebab shop…
Continue ReadingDon’t you just hate it wh …
Don’t you just hate it when you’re Facebook stalking a girl and pictures of her come up from when she was 12. No, wait, who am I kidding…
Continue ReadingI lost my job in a nuclea …
I lost my job in a nuclear power plant. Apparently my boss didn’t get my e-mail about me taking a week off work to go fission.
Continue ReadingI went out on the town wi …
I went out on the town with my Thesauras Enthusiasts Club last night. We coated the large village scarlet.
Continue ReadingIf practice makes perfect …
If practice makes perfect does that mean emo’s are the best at cutting birthday cake?
Continue ReadingI was with my mate in the …
I was with my mate in the pub earlier. I said, “For this time of year the weather is quite, ummm …” “Mild?” he volunteered. “Cheers mate. I’ll have a bag of crisps as well.”
Continue ReadingI pitched an idea to orga …
I pitched an idea to organise days out plane spotting for the blind. They couldn’t see it taking off.
Continue ReadingThis bloke from the pub t …
This bloke from the pub tries to sell computers on the cheap. He’s a bit of a Dell Boy.
Continue ReadingHave you ever felt like y …
Have you ever felt like you’ve had a sudden loss of hearing? Repeating the same thing over & over again and getting nowhere? Does your temper escalate furiously? Then you’ve dialed 118 118.
Continue ReadingWhats big and smells? A j …
Whats big and smells? A jews nose.
Continue ReadingWhy spend three quid on a …
Why spend three quid on a packet of bog roll when you can get a copy of The Sun for 25p?
Continue ReadingYeah doctor, i’ve been fe …
Yeah doctor, i’ve been feeling a bit… strange. like, sometimes past, sometimes future – you know? Yes yes, you sound a bit tense.
Continue ReadingComing soon: The Police i …
Coming soon: The Police iPhone Confession App: Download full confession, fall downstairs, then click on Agree.
Continue ReadingPC world have just announ …
PC world have just announced that due to a sudden rush of orders, F5 keys for PCs will be out of stock until mid july when the next shipment is due to arrive from China.
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