I’ve got a really exagger …
I’ve got a really exaggerated tic. You should see the state of a questionnaire when I’ve finished with it.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
BBC news headline – “Gang …
BBC news headline – “Gang rips out 1km of phone cable”. As of yet the Police have, no leads
Continue ReadingSo Rupert, Yogi and Winni …
So Rupert, Yogi and Winnie the Pooh walk into a bar… …bare jokes.
Continue ReadingWholemeal bread. I can’t …
Wholemeal bread. I can’t see this catching on. You need some meat and vegetables and stuff really.
Continue ReadingWhat do you call a Relian …
What do you call a Reliant Robin with a beach ball in it? A whistle.
Continue ReadingI hate taxi drivers that …
I hate taxi drivers that think they can defy the laws of gravity. They drive me up the wall.
Continue ReadingAttention ladies. If the …
Attention ladies. If the recycle bin on your boyfriend’s computer is always empty, he’s up to no good.
Continue ReadingMy Mum had tried killing …
My Mum had tried killing me when she was hoovering… She kept screaming Dyson! Dyson! Dyson!
Continue ReadingI want to go to a party d …
I want to go to a party dressed in cling film, but I don’t think I’ll be able to pull it off.
Continue ReadingIf you can make just one …
If you can make just one person’s day a little brighter… you’re probably not a very good electrician.
Continue ReadingMy wife wasnt happy when …
My wife wasnt happy when I announced I was going to be leaving to follow my dream. Or “Tanya from next door” as she is also known.
Continue ReadingApparently getting sucked …
Apparently getting sucked off in Thailand doesn’t always have a happy ending
Continue ReadingMy wife came home from wo …
My wife came home from work and I said, “Nice day?” She said, “It was pretty weird. People kept giving me funny looks” I said, “Really, how strange? Maybe it’s to do with the mirror I broke this morning?” She said, “You mean … the bad luck?” I said, “No, because you weren’t able to […]
Continue ReadingPolce Toay Announce They …
Polce Toay Announce They Are Nvestgatng A Strng Of ID Thefts.
Continue ReadingMy boss went balilstic ye …
My boss went balilstic yesterday because i popped out to buy some cigaretes from the nearest high street. Mind you, he does have a point. I work on an oil rig.
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