Paedophilia can put you i …
Paedophilia can put you in a tight spot.
Continue ReadingAuthor: qjoq.com
“Ginger powers activate!” …
“Ginger powers activate!” “You have lost all friends on Facebook.”
Continue ReadingI’ve been babysitting for …
I’ve been babysitting for a while now. They really do make the most comfortable chairs.
Continue ReadingFacebook users are roamin …
Facebook users are roaming the streets in tears, shoving photos of themselves in people’s faces and screaming ‘DO YOU LIKE THIS? DO YOU?’
Continue ReadingA doctor is speaking to a …
A doctor is speaking to a man. He says, “Do you want the good or the bad news first?” The man replies, “The good news.” The doctor says, “You have 24 hours to live.” “WHAT COULD BE WORSE THAN THAT?!” the man demands. “I was trying to reach you yesterday.”
Continue ReadingMy dad used to say “you s …
My dad used to say “you shouldn’t trust anyone…” I didn’t believe him.
Continue ReadingI’ve just run over a hood …
I’ve just run over a hoodie with my combine harvester. There’s no way I’m going to be able to seperate the wheat from the chav.
Continue ReadingRangers FC have unveiled …
Rangers FC have unveiled a new kit for the 2012/13 season. Apparently, the material came from a batch of freshly counted chickens.
Continue ReadingI wonder if he’d been pla …
I wonder if he’d been playing infamous?
Continue ReadingCNN News: At least 10 peo …
CNN News: At least 10 people killed in monster twister. Invite a vampire, a werewolf and godzilla to play Twister and you’re just asking for it.
Continue ReadingSo the owners of pirate b …
So the owners of pirate bay are inprison for 1 year for breaching copyright laws but the site is still running perfectly fine. Thats like me going to prison for stealing a car but when im inside my wife can use it to get to work?
Continue ReadingDid you hear about the ca …
Did you hear about the carpenter who became an MP? He put the cabinet together.
Continue ReadingI’m not insecure, am I? …
I’m not insecure, am I?
Continue ReadingMy Jamaican postman alway …
My Jamaican postman always leaves me wanting. Or another.
Continue ReadingMy grandad used to say “I …
My grandad used to say “If it wasn’t for me you’d all be speaking German.” Well it’s not like German people are speaking English.
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