Category: work

I find it really annoying when I’m on the way to work and forget something really important. Like my clothes.

Was telling the joke about the house that burnt down to a fireman the other day. He had to be there.

My family think I’m a bike stunts-man. “Always pulling wheelies,” I tell them. The sad truth is, I’m a bin-man.

Discovered today that playing dead only comes in handy when face to face with a bear, and NOT at important business meetings.

My boss said I’m just like a son to him. I thought it was a very nice thing to say, until he added, “You’re lazy, disrespectful and always asking me for more money.”

I cant belive the complete pack of lies my mate told in his latest job interview,and unbeliveably,he got the job. He starts as a psychic on monday.

I saw a wanted add in my local paper for van drivers/delivery drivers. The add stated “must be White and less than 5 years old.” Sick racist peadophiles.

I was in a queue at the petrol station today and noticed the bloke’s right arm in front of me was slightly darker than the other. He saw me looking so I nodded to his arm and said “truck driver?” he replied “no, vet.”

An electrician is interviewing for a construction job. “Can you roll your hard hat down your arm and make it pop back on your head?” the supervisor asks. “Sure,” he replies, confused. “Can you bounce your screwdriver off the concrete, spin in a circle and catch it in your tool pouch?” “Yes, sir,” he answers […]

I spent all yesterday in court just because I misinterpreted what “your business” means. A week previously while walking my dog I saw a sign that read When your dog has done its business, do yours. So I did.

I wonder if aspiring hairdressers pretend to brush their hair with a microphone in front of a mirror?

Men & women ran for their lives amid scenes of panic on the streets of Liverpool earlier. Early reports suggest that a local businessman entered a JobCentre in the city at approximately 1:30 in the afternoon & announced that he would like to employ up to 20 people. In a statement, local Labour MP Luciana […]

This Anti-cuts protest will really have an effect on my hairdressing business.

I got the order from head office, to fire three of my staff. I wrote out the letters of redundancy, and sent them to the unlucky ones. One particular girl would not go quietly, and burst into my office upon hearing the news. “How can you just fire me? I’ve worked here for 12 years! […]

Yesterday was my first day working on a construction site, and being the new guy I felt pretty sure that as a prank, someone would send me to fetch something that didn’t actually exist, you know, like ‘striped paint’ or something like that. Sure enough, someone ran up to me telling me to get an […]