Category: wordplay

Did very well again in this years anti-chivalry tournament… I always come in first.

The gear box in my mini broke this morning, so I’ve decided to get a new clutch. At least now when I take the car to the garage, I’ll look fabulous.

I tied up my wife the other day. Now she’s a ladyboy.

My boss delivered a riveting demonstration at work today. But he broke the rivet gun halfway through and just had to explain the rest

My son talks to invisible animals. I think they’re his menagerie friends.

Last night I had a chicken strip. It took some convincing but after ten minutes it was totally naked.

I just found that lost thesaurus and I am unambiguously rhapsodic!

If there is a god he took the Mick out of my family. Not that I’m bothered. I have bad memories of my uncle Michael and his magic sausage.

I’ve been bored recently so I’ve decided to take up fencing. The neighbours say they will call the police unless I put it back.

My mate asked me if I would ever consider kissing a mirror. To be honest, it’s not really something I can see myself doing.

I used to suffer from terrible acid indigestion. Man I loved tripping.

I had a job interview yesterday and went out wearing my favourite three-piece suit. It was all going well until I couldn’t fit the armchair through the doors.

Incest. Putting the relation into relationship.

I saw the most attractive audio technician the other day.. He was a pretty sound guy.

I’ve just opened a pub at the highest point in Northern Ireland. It’s called Top Of The Mourne Inn.