Category: wordplay

I asked my dad today if he knew the name of that yeast extract that you either love or hate. “Marmite,” He said. “Okay,” I replied, “I’ll go and ask her.”

Where do sheep get there mobiles from? Phones for ewe.

I’d like to introduce ice hockey to the Chinese if I can establish a rink with them.

I want to rob a spiral staircase from B&Q but not sure how I’m going to smuggle it out. Think I’ll take it one step at a time.

My wife wasn’t happy when I told her I wanted to be a lobotomist. She gave me a piece of her mind.

I found an old return train ticket from 1975 in my wallet today. It took me back.

Our headmaster at school was a real angry man Mr Phillips He was a cross head.

People who can’t spell should dye.

Trees Can Break Wind.

Is it solipsistic today or is it just me?

As far as I can see, these binoculars just don’t have enough zoom.

Nothing compares to my wife’s parking……… It’s unparalleled.

My wife’s been using that new voice recognition software to send me some sweet Emails. Dragon: Natrelly speaking.

With my business doing well in the UK, I decided to crack abroad. But she hit me back.

I just took a pound into Poundstretchers I came out with a Pooouuund