Category: wordplay

I’m trying to prove to my family I don’t need a sat nav. I’ve got a plan.

I just came back from a Blur concert. I didn’t see much.

If the next Dr Who is female, will she be Dr Whoover?

I can’t understand why no parents would let their kids join my string quartet Things are looking bleak for my group The Kiddy Fiddlers

Just after I saw a magpie outside, Antonio Banderas burst into my room wearing a mask and cape. Well, you know what they say: One for Zorro.

BBC News: Overtaking death driver sentenced. I really want to know how to overtake death.

I recently watched all of the Lord of The Rings films back to back with a friend. I wasn’t the one facing the screen though.

I was in court, guilty, when the judge finally said: ‘3 months inprisonment, or 2000, fine.’ I said ‘I’ll take the money, it seems ok to me.’

I saw a woman in the high street today selling novelty size mobile phones; she had the biggest pair of Nokias you have ever seen.

Where would you find a giant snail? On the end of his finger.

What did the fairytale character say when she visited Birmingham? Snow Whites.

Politics turns me on for some strange reason. I’m politically erect?

I wanted to go out dressed as a waxing strip last night. But I couldn’t pull it off.

I had a round of golf with my entire family today and I must say we all did pretty well…. even Pa.

I had my first “coming of age” experience the other day. The couple that moved in right next to just told me they have a 12 year old daughter.