Category: wordplay

Electrics really brighten up my day.

My doctor told me I had problems with my eyesight. I certainly didn’t see that coming.

I can’t remember the name of those cheesey crisps in a blue bag….. Wotsit called?

BBC News: JLS draw big crowd at Big Weekend I bet they think they’re real artists now.

My missus said that she would like a DS for Christmas. I’m not sure about that, I don’t really fancy adopting a Downs Syndrome kid.

My father brought me up single-handedly. It’s not easy being the son of a pirate.

From the look of her, Steps will be a lot harder for Claire Richards this time round.

I had a job application rejected today. They said I “didn’t fit the profile”. I asked, “How about if I stand sideways?”

My wife has left me for good after watching too many Clint Eastwood films. Well rather him than the bad or the ugly.

My girlfriend always insists on turning off the lights when we make love. It doesn’t really bother me, but it’s the hiding that seems so cruel.

When chemists do it, they do it on a table… Periodically.

My dad was an expert with a mitre saw but he was sacked for cutting too many corners

I recently dislocated my hip playing rugby, and when i went to the hospital the doctor told me he would have to do some complicated and extensive surgery to fix the problem. But it turns out he was just pulling my leg

recursion: n. See recursion.

Last night me and my mates got drunk at the top of a bungee jumping platform, Today we all had a horrible hangover.