Category: time

I put my clock forward like everybody told me to. It fell off the mantlepiece and smashed to bits.

My mate Dave said he had to give up his time machine experiments, he tried going back 10,000 years and then went forward 10,000 years in steps of a 1,000. He said ” I can’t understand it, nothing ever changed! All the people and buildings just stayed the same.” I guess Africa wasnt the best […]

Oh well, I’ve Just looked at the clock and decided to call it a day. Which is stupid because it’s a clock!

My new clock is simply amazing, it can actually count. The last time I looked at it, it said 0123

Think I put my clock back too far. My mum just asked me to the Enchantment Under the Sea dance.

Before light bulbs were invented what used to pop above peoples heads when they had a good idea?

What did the Rolex say to the sun-dial? “How’s it going old timer?”

01:00 to 02:00 this morning. Now there’s an hour of my life I’ll never get back.

I once built a time machine. Yes, I remember it like it was tomorrow.

I’ve just put my clock backwards. Didn’t help at all, can’t see the time now…

Maybe I’m not imaginative enough, but if I had a time machine, I think I’d just fast-forward to bedtime.

I spent 14 hours designing a belt from old stopwatches. Then realised it was just a waist of time…

I said to my mate, “Did you know that the new iphone has a time travel app on it?” He said, “What, the iphone 5?” I said, “No, the iphone 37.”

I love the clocks going forward, it really brings people together. Right now, up and down the nation, literally thousands of people are united in looking at their computer screen and their mobile phone and trying to work out whether they changed themselves automatically in the night or whether they are still an hour behind.

Time really flies by. Seems like only yesterday I was just a young apprentice-bater.