Category: social networks

I split up with my girlfriend last night. Rather than announcing that we had broken up on Facebook, I simply deleted her and then requested her again. When she accepted my request it stated that we were now friends.

In about 50 years from now,gravestones will read “Beloved Wife, Mother, Sister, Daughter, and Facebook friend.”

Farmville has a new addition. “(user) has found some fuel to share” with a nice cartoon of a white lady giving fuel to a black man… Yes…share…im sure

I thought my Facebook was broken, but it turned out I just haven’t got any friends.

Current Facebook statuses doing the rounds: ‘I may not have a magazine perfect body or long flowing hair. I may not have loads of money and expensive clothes, but when I look in the mirror I see a proud mother working hard to raise my kids. Post this if you’re a proud mother’. Translation: ‘Yeah, […]

My wife’s not talking to me because I won’t accept her as a friend on facebook. I’ve told her, the only people I accept as friends, are people I actually like.

Just seen the Facebook Group ‘I Hate Conformity’. Yes, because starting a group against conformity really dodges that bullet.

I think my Twitter account is run by a teenage fast food worker. Every time I log in it tells me: “The server understood the request, but is refusing to fulfill it”.

Years ago, when someone was tired, they went to bed. These days they turn on their computer and tell all their “friends” on Facebook that they’re tired, and then they go to bed. Alone.

My wife told me I spend too much time on facebook, so I poked her and liked her divorced status.

I love Facebook, the “Chat” option is brilliant. You can say anything you want to anyone in the world. Because they probably won’t receive it.

War’s breaking out. There’s constant threat of terrorism. Mother Nature is destroying countries. There’s a possibillity of the world ending next year.. What have these all got in common? None of them upset or anger the British community more than the new Facebook layout.

I lost my dog so I sent a tweet on Twitter to try and find him #hereboy

My friend told me that he thought I was addicted to Facebook. So I poked him and posted a status containing my dislike for him.

“Tom Smith: Had a lovely day at the park”. Seeing as people are posting our jokes on their Facebook status’, I feel it would only be fair to post their status’ as our jokes, right?