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Category: sarcasm

Comic Relief and Walkers …

February 24qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Comic Relief and Walkers …

Comic Relief and Walkers Crisps have teamed up to raise money by using celebrities with witty names for their flavours: Stephen Fry Up Jimmy con Carrne Steak and Al Pie Frank Roast Dinner You know why they never chose David Seaman? Because he’s a footballer not a comedian.

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MasterCard: “There are so …

February 23qjoq.comLeave a Comment on MasterCard: “There are so …

MasterCard: “There are some things money can’t buy.” Like defence?

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Yahoo: What happened to t …

February 19qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Yahoo: What happened to t …

Yahoo: What happened to the Lost Boys? I think the answer lies in the question.

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Being a woman involves sp …

February 19January 1qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Being a woman involves sp …

Being a woman involves spending half of your time being lost, and the other half, getting there.

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Rather than saying, “And …

February 18qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Rather than saying, “And …

Rather than saying, “And here’s your receipt,” cashiers should say, “Will you throw this away for me?”

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Wheelchair basket-baller …

February 15qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Wheelchair basket-baller …

Wheelchair basket-baller breaks leg. Well that must have hurt.

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Sometimes I like to go up …

February 14qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Sometimes I like to go up …

Sometimes I like to go up to people in wheelchairs and softly whisper “Natural Selection” in their ear.

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Sky Sports News: Haye los …

February 6qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Sky Sports News: Haye los …

Sky Sports News: Haye lost because of a broken toe. Fair play to him; I once broke a toe and I couldnt punch for weeks…

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I asked my mechanic how l …

February 4qjoq.comLeave a Comment on I asked my mechanic how l …

I asked my mechanic how long he had been in the trade, and he said “340 years”. When I asked him how was that possible, he replied “That is just the estimate”.

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Statistically, 3/4 of an …

February 3qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Statistically, 3/4 of an …

Statistically, 3/4 of an injured soldier won’t appreciate Jimmy Carr’s joke.

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BBC News – Artist Tracey …

February 3qjoq.comLeave a Comment on BBC News – Artist Tracey …

BBC News – Artist Tracey Emin has said she is thinking of leaving the UK in protest about being overtaxed. Finally. A Labour Policy that has benefited the people!

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PCSO is an anagram of COP …

January 30qjoq.comLeave a Comment on PCSO is an anagram of COP …

PCSO is an anagram of COPS. Which ironically, is about as close as they will get to becoming one.

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Sarcasm – The ability to …

January 28qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Sarcasm – The ability to …

Sarcasm – The ability to insult idiots without them realizing.

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In other news, scientists …

January 26qjoq.comLeave a Comment on In other news, scientists …

In other news, scientists are trying to figure out if those who believed the recent McDonald’s hoax have an IQ above 18.

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Al-Qaeda must be reeling …

January 23qjoq.comLeave a Comment on Al-Qaeda must be reeling …

Al-Qaeda must be reeling after the death of Bin Laden. Where on earth will they find another bearded Muslim extremist to replace him?

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