Category: puns

Can my friend name at least one ninja weapon? Shuriken

Contortionists are twisted people.

Never lie to an x-ray technician. They can see right through you.

I’m starting to believe I’m psychic…..but then again, of course, I already knew that.

I’m in charge of the national armed forces…. generally speaking.

I can’t stop thinking about prisons…. My mind works in Strangeways.

I’m a geologist, it rocks.

My face fell as I held my winning scratchcard. Stroke of luck, that.

What do you get when you cross a cow with an arab? Milk Sheikh

I saw a sign today when I was driving, it said “Falling Rocks”. I thought , it won’t rock so much if it was you going off the cliff edge “Mister Council Man”.

Arabia’s got talent. Their performances will blow you away.

My mate told me he bought his girlfriend a Subaru! I asked “Impreza?” he said “Yes it did”

BBC SPORT: “Tottenham in talks to sign Adebayor” Hmmmm this could really be a shot in the foot in terms of Adebayor’s career. And the last thing they want is yet another black man getting shot over there.

Once a year my village holds a market for the locals to sell their wares. I baked a couple of cakes to flog – one was priced at a pound, and the other one was a fiver. A chap stopped at my stall and looked at the cakes, before pointing at the one costing a […]

I was on Oprah’s show , sitting on her couch when she came over and sat on my lap . I felt Opressed.