Category: one liner

Not saying my husband has got a big nose, but he’s the only person I know that can smoke in the shower!

I once applied to be a male stripper. They put me on their shortlist

I tried avoiding vodka today but its 40% stronger than me.

Funnily enough, any hope of having a satirical joke voted up on Sickipedia gets dashed at around 1am.

Personally, I’m just gutted that it wasn’t Ronan Keating.

Harry’s feet weren’t the only thing sticking out of his invisibility cloak as he wandered around the girl’s changing rooms.

Has anybody else ever noticed that market sounds a bit like meerkat? Remarkable.

Why does monosyllabic have 5 syllables?

I have a burning question, Is it hot?

Did the makers of Freddo really think putting the price up wouldn’t be noticed?!

Poverty stricken arthritic contortionists have trouble making ends meet.

I’m a coward and I am very afraid to admit it.

Turns out Dirty Dancing wasn’t what I thought it was.

Women are only good for one thing,two if they can cook.

Evolution nowadays, it’s not what it used to be.