Category: money

I knew my finances were bad, but I didn’t realise how bad they were until I put my card in the cash machine today. The machine swallowed my card and a message popped up saying, ‘GAME OVER’

I’ve got a pony in my pocket. Or at least that’s what I tell all the girls.

When I was a kid we were so poor, we would go to KFC and lick other peoples fingers.

No wonder I’ve been having financial problems, I just found out my wages have been going directly to rapper Lloyd Banks.

I was at the office Christmas party last night and popped out of the hotel to get some money out the cash machine. This woman approached me and said Give me 40 and Ill do anything you want so I gave her the 40 and told her to double glaze my house.

I’ve maxed out at the bank and they keep phoning me, I wish they would just leave me a loan.

Wonga.com Legalised stealing.

I’ve got some reliable inside information about Apple’s next product. I won’t be able to afford it.

QuickQuid, because everyone is stupid enough to have all their outgoings at the end of the month…

Just before Magners released their excellent yearly figures, a mate tipped me off & I bought thousands of shares. Unfortunately, he’s been arrested for in-cider trading.

My wife told me she’s pregnant with a girl. That’s great, I can save 20% on allowance!

Remember, Credit card debt is for life, not just for Christmas

I’m not in debt, I’m just big-loaned…

The Joseph Rowntree Foundation lists scores of key indicators of poverty in the U.K split into eight main categories. Over the last few years I have been working on a way of simplifying the process and I’m proud to say that after much testing I have now confirmed that I have a method to diagnose […]

Headline: Six million hit by tax errors. Would it be in bad taste to add holocaust at the end?