My pet elk has vanished, …
My pet elk has vanished, one moment it was in the garden next moment vamoose
Continue ReadingMy pet elk has vanished, one moment it was in the garden next moment vamoose
Continue ReadingWhat’s the difference between your brain and your grandmother, naked and bent over? Your brain was in your head before you read this.
Continue ReadingMy brother said out loud that I have an overly developed imagination, all of my family laughed. They won’t be laughing when I set Ryan on them. Ryan’s my pet kraken.
Continue ReadingNot happy whatsoever, not once in all the Harry Potter films did i see a ”dont try this at home” message. Suddenly my daughter thinks shes found ”the bomb” because shes married to ”the chosen one” and to top it off hes ginger!! suppose his mother Dianna was killed in a ”car crash”
Continue ReadingI was fired from my job as a children’s magician today… Apparently, when I make the kids disappear, I also have to make them re-appear.
Continue ReadingI plan on suing derren brown in the new few days after his latest trick. My brother just can’t get out of his wheelchair.
Continue ReadingMy wife told me that i couldn’t manage to be a full-time dad and a successful magician at the same time Lets see what she says now i’ve turned my daughter into a woman
Continue ReadingMy mate suggested I tell my wife about my magic addiction by writing her a letter I just can’t pick up the Penn and Teller
Continue ReadingDo wands come with spell checkers?
Continue ReadingThe Hogwarts episode of Cribs is the worst. Every room they went in, someone says, “This is where the magic happens.”
Continue ReadingFate. The Lazy way of defining coincidence to morons.
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