Category: magic

My pet elk has vanished, one moment it was in the garden next moment vamoose

What’s the difference between your brain and your grandmother, naked and bent over? Your brain was in your head before you read this.

My brother said out loud that I have an overly developed imagination, all of my family laughed. They won’t be laughing when I set Ryan on them. Ryan’s my pet kraken.

Not happy whatsoever, not once in all the Harry Potter films did i see a ”dont try this at home” message. Suddenly my daughter thinks shes found ”the bomb” because shes married to ”the chosen one” and to top it off hes ginger!! suppose his mother Dianna was killed in a ”car crash”

I was fired from my job as a children’s magician today… Apparently, when I make the kids disappear, I also have to make them re-appear.

I plan on suing derren brown in the new few days after his latest trick. My brother just can’t get out of his wheelchair.

My wife told me that i couldn’t manage to be a full-time dad and a successful magician at the same time Lets see what she says now i’ve turned my daughter into a woman

My mate suggested I tell my wife about my magic addiction by writing her a letter I just can’t pick up the Penn and Teller

Do wands come with spell checkers?

The Hogwarts episode of Cribs is the worst. Every room they went in, someone says, “This is where the magic happens.”

Fate. The Lazy way of defining coincidence to morons.