Category: little johnny

Little Mary told her mother that dumb little Johnny had paid her a dollar just to see her climb a telephone pole. Mother said” why Mary he only did that so he could look up your dress and see your panties”. Little Mary replied “I know but I sure fooled him. I wasn’t wearing any […]

I’m getting a bit sick of all these “Little Johnny” jokes I keep getting told. I dont even want to wear one in the first place.

“Open up, It’s social services. We are hear to talk about your son Johnny”

Teacher : “Johnny stop copying Lucy. If Lucy jumped off a bridge, would you do it?” Johnny: “Is that your saying, Miss?”

Little Johnny was helping his father to rake up some leaves. His father started to tell him how it was the fairies that had turned the leaves brown. Little Johnny looked puzzled for a moment and asked his father if he had ever heard of photosynthesis.

Little Johnny said to his teacher, “I don’t think I deserve a zero on this test.” The teacher replied, “Neither do I, but it’s the lowest mark I can give you.”

“So little johnny, what do you want to be when you grow up?” “I’m gonna follow my dads footsteps & be a policeman” “Ohhhh, is your dad a policeman then?” “No, he’s a bank robber”

Pastor: “Do you know where little boys and girls go when they do bad things?” Little Johnny: “Sure, back of the church yard.”

During Sunday dinner, Little Johnny wants to say something to his Dad, but his Dad raises a warning finger: “Be quiet. I am talking to the grown-ups. Speak when you are spoken to.” When the conversation is over, Little Johnny is allowed to speak: “Doesn’t matter now, Dad,” he says. “You’ve already eaten the slug […]

Little Johnny: “What’s The difference between theoretically and realistically?” Dad: “It’s hard to explain. I tell you what, ask your mum if she would sleep with the milkman for a million quid and come and tell me what she says.” A couple minutes later, Little Johnny: “She said, ‘yes’.” Dad: “Now ask your sister if […]

Anybody else think that little johnny, is going to have quite a remarkable life story?

Little Johnny lived in the country. They had to use an outhouse, and Little Johnny hated it because it was hot in the summer and cold in the winter and stank all the time. The outhouse was sitting on the bank of a creek and Johnnie determined that one day he would push that outhouse […]

I treat my women how I treat my condoms; I eventually break them and put them in the bin.