Category: joke

Why did the spy cross the road? Because he was never really on your side.

Jazz always reminds me of the time I kicked a one man band down a flight of stairs!

Four humans and a Muslim walked into a premature punch line.

Cinema ticket for the premier of Harry Potters next movie: 6.50 hitting the fire alarm panel 10 minutes before it finishes: priceless

I’ve got someone coming round in half an hour to measure up for a conservatory. I can’t wait to see their faces when they realise I’m in a third floor flat.

What can Skittles do that Men can’t? come in 5 different flavours

‘Help, i need somebody. Help, not just anybody. Help, you know i need someone, Help’ The Beatles were lucky the U.S army never heard this song.

Today is a national day of mourning in America. However, if you’re from the Middle East it’s a national holiday.

I never tell observational jokes. I don’t like to discriminate against the blind.

My mate asked me if i could help him fix his clock. so I gave him a hand.

Has anybody else ever felt bad about a racist joke they’ve ever written or read? No me neither

I like my children like I like my jokes. Not getting old.

I’ve made up three jokes this week. The first was about a ghetto blaster, the second was about a Walkman and the third was about a Hitachi Midi system. Like all my jokes, they rely on stereo types.

I like my women,like I like my cars………… Escorts.

I got called into the bosses office on the first day of my new job. “I think you may have mislead us about your qualifications,” he said. “What do you mean,” I asked. “Well, you’re the only Gynaecologist I’ve seen who thinks it’s acceptable to use his tongue in a routine examination.”