Category: joke

What’s the difference between a comedienne and God. Nothing, no evidence exists to suggest the existence of either.

If only Sickipedia had a penny every time somebody mashed F5… They could launch a takeover bid for Google and replace all search results with Sickipedia jokes. Oh, and possibly buy a new server.

Every time someone say’s ‘Expect the unexpected’ I like to punch them in the face, Just to check….

I decided to play a practical joke on the wife earlier but she didn’t see the funny side when I wired up the front door to the power supply. She completely flew off the handle.

My teenage daughter was always telling me how she thought “No-one cared about her”. I proved her wrong though, I put her into a care home.

A man walked in to a Catholic Church, dying for a drink. He desperately ran over to the Holy Water and began to drink. Almost immediately, the man began to choke, and spat the water back out. A Catholic Priest, baffled, stormed over to the man and asked him what the matter was. “This water […]

“Some are soft. Some are strong. And some are long.” Am I the only one that got the wrong idea of that advert?

What do you call an Arab who campaigns for adolescents? A pro-teen sheikh.

A father is a man with pictures in his wallet where he used to keep his money when he was single

From what I’ve read, it seems like John F. Kennedy was a real open-minded guy.

I stopped smoking after I found out it could seriously harm my baby. I’m not letting anything hurt my PS3.

Took my dog to the vets this morning and he told me it’s in heat. I didn’t even realise it was a celebrity.

I was watching the national hairdresser championships on TV earlier, apparently they ran out of time for the live coverage, it’s ok – I can watch the highlights later…

First day on the new job and I wanted to impress, so I wore my best suit and designer shoes. The Foreman guessed that I’d never worked on a building site before.

I’ve started doing some voluntary work for my local fire station. I’m an arsonist!