Category: irony

My best friend came up to me yesterday and said, “This is a photo of me when I was younger.” I replied, “Every photo is of when you were younger.”

The doctor diagnosed me with bibliophobia, but i wasn’t very sure what it was. He told me to read up on it.

Sorry, lost my train of… Never mind

Nicola Roberts is appearing at T4 on the Beach tomorrow. I suspect this will be her first time on a beach ever.

Wouldn’t it be ironic if La Roux was shot dead in her living room? Not so bulletproof now are you…

Whenever a group I like post something there’s always a race to be the first to post and people always say “first” How childish can you get? And don’t they know first the worst Second the best Third the one with a hairy chest

My grandmother asked me if I hate God, because I don’t go to church. I told her that I cannot possibly hate someone who doesn’t exist.

I always thought that M. Night Shyamalan was the master of films with a twist ending. But it turns out, he’s not.

I’ve just published a book on preserving the rainforest and what we can do as a human race to help protect it. It’s over 2000 pages long.

I had a great joke about Madeline McCann, but I couldn’t get to my laptop to put it on this site and I knew I’d forget it, so I wrote it down on a bit of paper and left it in the hotel room, but when I came back it had completely disappeared… Oh the […]

Its no fun being on death row. That’s why I’ve sent them a game to play. Its the one where you have to try to get the ring down the end without touching the wire and completing the circuit. How they must laugh when the buzzer goes off.

I hate people who make spelling errors because they type without looking at the keyboard. It gets on my tots.

THE TIMES: Optimist drowns in half-full bath tub..

Suicidal kids. They can end a life, but they can’t fight back against a bully.

MATHEMATICS — HIGHER TIER — 2011 Q1) Sindeepa throws 4 unbiased coins and records the results. Calculate the probability we have used this name because we’re scared of being racist.